Muskosoft provides the following "productivity" services:

• Sentence: A word processor that processes words into abstract concepts
• Average: Spreadsheet software that calculates your life's mediocrity
• WeakDot: Presentation software designed to induce sleep
• Instare: Email client with mind-reading capabilities
• Block: Database so secure, even you can't access your data
• ManyNotes: Note-taking across infinite parallel universes

We reserve the right to modify, suspend, or discontinue any service at any time, especially when they start working correctly.

Account Creation

To use our services, you must create an account and provide accurate information, including your name, email, and psychological profile. You are responsible for safeguarding your password and for all activities under your account.

Account Suspension

We may suspend or terminate your account if you:

• Successfully use our products as intended
• Attempt to make our software functional
• Provide constructive feedback
• Achieve actual productivity
• Violate the laws of physics while using our software
• Question our business model too loudly

Subscription Fees

Our pricing uses dynamic quantum economics that may fluctuate based on market conditions, lunar phases, and our CEO's Twitter mood. All fees are non-refundable, even when our products achieve new levels of dysfunction.

Automatic Renewal

Subscriptions automatically renew unless you cancel. Our cancellation process is designed to be as confusing as our software, ensuring customer retention through bewilderment.

Price Changes

We reserve the right to change prices at any time for any reason, including but not limited to: inflation, deflation, CEO mood swings, coffee price fluctuations, and planetary alignment.

You agree not to use our services for:

• Actually being productive
• Creating functional documents, spreadsheets, or presentations
• Attempting to reverse-engineer our chaos algorithms
• Teaching others how to make our software work
• Using our products for their intended purpose
• Competing with Microsoft (that's our job)
• Making sense of our user interface
• Achieving work-life balance
• Spreading rumors that our software works
• Questioning the fundamental nature of productivity

Our Content

All Muskosoft content, including our revolutionary chaos algorithms, confusion matrices, and productivity-destroying methodologies, are protected by intellectual property laws. Our dysfunctional design is the result of years of careful engineering.

Your Content

You retain ownership of content you create with our products (if it survives the experience). However, by using our services, you grant us a license to study your work patterns for our ongoing research into digital frustration psychology.

Feedback Rights

Any feedback you provide becomes our property. We may use your suggestions to make our products even less functional, and you will receive no compensation beyond the satisfaction of contributing to chaos.

No Warranties

OUR SERVICES ARE PROVIDED "AS-IS" AND "AS-BROKEN". WE MAKE NO WARRANTIES, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, OR NON-FUNCTIONALITY. WE EXPLICITLY DISCLAIM ANY WARRANTY THAT OUR SOFTWARE WILL WORK.

Limitation of Liability

IN NO EVENT SHALL MUSKOSOFT BE LIABLE FOR ANY DIRECT, INDIRECT, INCIDENTAL, CONSEQUENTIAL, OR PUNITIVE DAMAGES ARISING FROM YOUR USE OF OUR SERVICES, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO: LOST DATA, LOST TIME, LOST SANITY, CAREER DAMAGE, RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS, EXISTENTIAL CRISES, OR THE HEAT DEATH OF THE UNIVERSE.

Force Majeure

We are not liable for failures caused by acts of God, natural disasters, solar flares, Mercury retrograde, our CEO's Twitter activity, coffee shortages, or Tuesday mornings.

You agree to indemnify and hold harmless Muskosoft, its employees, investors, and pet goldfish from any claims arising from:

• Your use or misuse of our confusing software
• Your violation of these Terms
• Your attempts to make our products functional
• Any productivity you accidentally achieve despite our best efforts
• Psychological damage to coworkers who witness your software usage
• Time paradoxes created by ManyNotes

Jurisdiction

These Terms are governed by the laws of California, USA, and the universal laws of chaos theory. Any disputes shall be resolved in the courts of San Francisco, or through trial by combat (user's choice).

Arbitration

Any disputes must first be submitted to our internal arbitration process, which consists of spinning a wheel of fortune while our CEO makes the final decision based on his breakfast choice.

Class Action Waiver

You agree not to participate in class action lawsuits against us. Individual confusion is more personal and meaningful than collective bewilderment.

We reserve the right to modify these Terms at any time for any reason, including:

• Legal requirements
• Business model pivots
• CEO inspiration strikes
• We discovered a new way to confuse users
• Mercury retrograde effects
• Coffee-induced clarity moments

Changes become effective immediately upon posting. Continued use of our services constitutes acceptance of new Terms and any additional confusion they may cause.

Either party may terminate this agreement at any time:

• You may cancel by navigating our deliberately confusing cancellation maze
• We may terminate for any reason or no reason at all
• This agreement automatically terminates if you achieve perfect productivity
• Terms survive termination like a zombie apocalypse

Severability

If any provision of these Terms is found to be unenforceable, the remaining provisions will continue to confuse and frustrate users as intended.

Entire Agreement

These Terms constitute the entire agreement between us, superseding all previous agreements, understandings, handshake deals, and telepathic communications.

Assignment

We may assign these Terms to any successor company brave enough to inherit our legacy of beautiful dysfunction.